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How to take control of your life

Updated: Jul 15, 2023

Taking control of your life doesn't mean gaining control over everything that happens; it means consciously and actively making choices and decisions that shape the direction of your life.

It involves taking responsibility for your actions and the consequences that come with them. It also means identifying your goals and priorities, creating a plan to achieve them, and taking action to make them a reality.

Taking control of your life

It requires being proactive, staying focused on the present moment, and persistently facing obstacles and challenges. Ultimately, taking control of your life means living a life aligned with your values and purpose and creating a fulfilling and meaningful life for yourself.

Six ways to gain control in your life:

1. Clarify your core values and beliefs:

Clarifying your core values and beliefs is essential in understanding yourself and what shapes your response. You will be pulled in a thousand different ways if you chase after other people's dreams. You need to know what you want if you want to regain control of your existence and your core beliefs enter into that situation.

Every individual has different core values and beliefs; discovering them can build self-esteem and boost decision-making because you recognize whether your decision is aligned with your values.

Your core value strengthens your beliefs and makes your ground where you can shape your life and makes sense of your true self.

Discovering your core values and beliefs helps you follow your passion, long-term career goals, and relationship. Also, prioritizing your goal allows you to find what you love and what truly matters to you, when to say no, and when to accept with open arms.

2. Take personal responsibility:

In this fast-paced world, there are many uncontrollable things, and one cannot change or even Predict them. But there is one thing we can always gain control of our attitude and action.

Taking personal responsibility means controlling your life by balancing your do's and don'ts. Take some time to reflect on what is most important to you in life.

Taking personal responsibility

What do you stand for? What motivates and drives you? Write down a list of your wants. Take charge of your life, work on your flaws, and make the best version of yourself.

3. Identify internal vs. external motivations:

Identifying internal vs. external motivations is essential in taking personal responsibility to gain your core values.

Internal motivations come from within you and are driven by your desires and passions, and external motivations come from outside sources, such as rewards, recognition, or pressure from others.

Find your internal motivations, and ask yourself what brings you joy and fulfillment. What activities do you enjoy doing simply for the sake of doing them?

What goals do you have that are not driven by external factors, such as money or status? You follow your dreams that are full of passion and personal desire.

Then find external motivations, and ask yourself what goals or activities are driven by external factors. For example, do you work hard to earn money to impress your parents or others or to maintain a particular lifestyle?

Do you pursue specific goals because they will bring you recognition or approval from others?

Many conflicts come when you want to follow your passion or dream, but your parents want you to attain the designation, and here you have to balance between both.

This means prioritizing the activities and goals that bring you joy and fulfillment rather than those driven by external pressures.

4. Create a vision:

Creating a vision is essential in attaining your life's core values. Here are tips on how to take control of your life:

  • Visualize your ideal life: The word ideal is a conflict because the ideal condition does not exist. You will not attain the ideal life if you drive your life by yourself. Although you can create your vision of how you want your life to be. You can visualize your life; what does it look like? How do you feel? What activities are you engaged in? What relationships do you have?

  • Develop a plan: Once you discover your life goal, develop a detailed plan that outlines the steps you will take to achieve your goals. Break your goals into different ones and start working on them by giving deadlines for each step.

  • Stay focused and motivated: Stay focused on your vision and the aim of your life. Ignore the distracting person or things in your life, and keep your mind consistent. Meet with the people who encourage you or support you.

  • Adapt and adjust: Be open to adjusting your vision and your goals as necessary. Life is unpredictable, and circumstances may change. Be willing to adapt and adjust your plan to stay aligned with your core values and continue progressing toward your ideal life.

5. Priorities in your life:

Prioritizing your life is an essential step towards taking control of your life. Follow these steps to prioritize your life:

  • Identify your values: Think about what is most important to you. This could include family, career, health, spirituality, and personal growth. Identify the top three to five values that are most important to you.

  • Set goals: Once you have identified your values, set specific goals that align with those values. Make sure your goals are realistic, achievable, and measurable.

  • Prioritize your time: Make a list of your daily activities and determine which activities are aligned with your values and goals. Prioritize the most important activities to you and delegate or eliminate those that are not.

  • Practice self-care: Being in control of your life, you must practice self-care, this healthy, balanced life. Self-care includes getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet, exercising regularly, and taking time for relaxation and fun.

  • Stay focused: Avoid distractions, things, or people in your life to gain focus. Set your priorities before accepting any offer; saying 'NO' is ok if that consumes your valuable time and snatches focus from your goal.

6. Embracing challenges:

It can be a powerful way of taking control of your life. Let's look at the tips that help you embrace the challenge.

Embracing challenges

  • Reframe your perspective: Instead of seeing challenges as obstacles, reframe them as opportunities for growth and learning. View them as a chance to develop new skills, gain new experiences, and build resilience. Break your challenge into manageable steps that help you to stay focussed and motivated and progress towards your goals.

  • Embrace discomfort: Change and growth often require discomfort, so be willing to step outside your comfort zone. Challenge yourself to try new things, take risks, and push yourself beyond your limits.

  • Practice self-compassion: Be kind and compassionate with yourself when facing challenges. Sometimes you may feel failure is around, but you must understand that failure is a sign of success. This is the kick point where you start working with double motivation, and this time will attain control of your life.


Taking control of your life requires a combination of self-awareness, determination, and action. It begins with a mindset shift, where you find that you have the power to make choices and decisions that shape your life.

To take control of your life:

  1. Start by identifying your values, strengths, and weaknesses.

  2. Set clear goals and develop a plan to achieve them.

  3. Prioritize your core value and embrace challenges.

Follow the above steps and can create the life you want and deserve with determination and persistence.

About The Author

Sibghat Tabassum is a skilled and experienced content writer. She is eager to develop a distinctive content approach and possesses outstanding verbal and written communication abilities. She has mastered the art of assuming throughout her career, she has mastered the art of assuming the audience's viewpoint.

Her goal was to produce flawless, coherent work that would hold the audience's interest and inspire them to take action. She appreciates creating new content every day for a different task for a different client and believes that multitasking and achieving numerous deadlines will improve her writing. She is willing to venture outside her comfort zone to learn new abilities.

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